.the sweetest love of all.

Thursday, June 24, 2010 7:48 AM

is this relationship still surviving ?
or are we on the verge of breaking up?
are you still the guy whom i first known?
or have u changed completely into someone else?
my heart feel so unstable.
i wish i could voice it out to you.
baby what has happen to us?
cant u treat me better?
can u not leave me alone anymore?
can u cherish me more?
i began to realise,
time has realli passed very fast.
i still love you with every breathe tt i take.
my heart beats for u every single time we're together.
i tried to play a good part,
but i hope u noe wad it takes to make me happy.
dun ever let me feel lonely anymore.
will u ever noe how ive been feeling?
im so afraid tt u sae its over,
because its the last word i ever wan to hear.
baby;
~~dun let my heart die on you.~~

Thursday, June 17, 2010 1:25 AM

i know what i have regretted in my life.
i know what has causes all this to become the ending.
~~why am i feeling a little mixed up in my heart?~~

Tuesday, June 15, 2010 5:47 AM

all the changes i have from 2007 until now.
actually i think i till look the same.hahas
only with more pimples and darker eyebag(:

year2007

year 2008

year 2008

year 2008

year 2009

year 2009

mar2010

and the most recent photo i took few days back.

june2010
i was just chatting with many people about time passing really fast.
i read back on alot of past love notes and all,
most of the time even trying to figure who wrote it to me and who i wrote to.lols.
my birthday is approaching in 13days time.
i mean it has been realli fast.
when i started counting down,
back than it was like 2mths plus ago.
and now it less than two weeks.
what will i have for this year?
maybe the more i grow up,
i start to stop all my wiseful thinking.
i start to stop my fairytale dreams and all.
i mean i began to realise many things i have not realised in the past.

my birthday is reali approaching,
but i know very well the people who wished me last yr,
will nvr wished me now.
the people who i spent my birthday with,
will never spend with me anymore.
many things have realli changed.
because a yr has past,
people might eventually forget how close they used to be with u etc..

these few years alot ppl step in and out of my life.
let me think back...
there are two person tt step into my life when i worked in jackplace,
and eventually left footprints in me.
i still rmb last year during my birthdae,
i had a fought with janelle after stjames..
but on my bdae she rushed down to celebrate with me.
i was hoping athari would have surprised me,
but he didnt.
and end up i fought with yinjie..

this year,
renee suddenly ended the friendship with me.
and zhihao and i got back in contact again.
maybe all these were fate?
people who were meant to stay should have stayed,
people who were meant to go will eventually leave.
i guess when i come to think back,
i still feel alittle upset.
coming to think of drifting with ppl whom are close to me once,
coming to think of sister i used to have.
coming to think of someone who would rush down whenever im in trouble.
but now i am already 19yrs old,
im no longer the 14yrs old girl u once noe.
no longer the 16 yrs old girl u once worry for.
no longer the 18 yrs old girl u always got angry with.
even if now i wan to make u angry,
even if i wanna make u care for me,
even if i wan you to notice me for the last time,
it all too late.
because u are gone.

suddenly funny thoughts have been rummagin thru my mind.
i mean i cant predict the future.
but who knows wad will happen in the end?
maybe e past had left you crying bitterly,
trying to struggle thru the pain.
but end up down in 5 or 10 years time,
the same thing will happen between u and the person,
but this time with a different ending?
i dunno..
im still hoping,
and i realli did hope.(:

i told YOU everyone has a past,
but not everyone dwell back.
they just did some looking back.
looking back at how foolish they were,
looking back at how stupid they have been.
looking back at how they tried to stand up from where they fall.
but they do not stay there and hold onto the pain.
instead,
they cry,
they feel the pain
and yet they still move on.
you said i have not grown up,
but u are wrong,
because days without u i have been trying to stand strong.
and now i am proud because ive made it.(:

i told myself joanna yong,
you just try..
try and never lose hope.
but the more i tried,
the more i realise u are realli gone.
so im giving up hope.
anywae,
i guess alot of my frens will tink im heartless.
im sorry to janelle and chris.
it has been so long since i contacted u guys or even mit up...

i told germ and zhihao,
many things have reali changed.
and coming to think of the past,
CHEE ZHIHAO U STIL OWE ME SUSHI UH.=)
germaine said it was fun.
i guess it reali was?
but out of all fun i had,
ive hurt many people intentionally & unintentionally.
just because i was still very immature and childish back than.
well anywae its the past(:.

so once again,
people who read my blog will be wondering..
'what the hell is this girl toking abt?'
but i like to sound as though im writing in mystery.
and if u noe it's u,
im sure u CAN feel it.
but i doubt u ever read my blog anymore(: .

Monday, June 14, 2010 12:35 AM

firstly,
joanna yong is extremely upset as she is havin alot of pimples poppin out!
secondly,
joanna yong is very tired havin to work work work everydae.
thirdly,
joanna yong has been undergoing severe 'depression' bcuz of surrounding things.
fourthly,
joanna yong boyfriend is busy playin game and ignoring her!!
lastly but not least,
joanna yong birthday is coming soon(:.

last week celebrated mummy birthdae on my anniversary.
time indeed pass so fast.
but few days later sth happen to me n baby,
perhap it want at the right time,
he was stress up with things ard him,
and yet i am there irritating him with all stupid thing.
but im glad baby and i are trying to mend back the hurt again..
i hope everythin has been settled for him,
hopin tt he is not as stress as before(:

recently,
i think back.
there are many people ive not seen for ages.
i start to realise that im drifting away from reality.
but i didnt care much,
i have a chance to mit them up,
but i choose not to because i dun want.
and maybe its because of all this.
but nvmx why would i care?

its already juneeee now!
time pass so fast.
heard from baby his daddy gonna surprise me on my bdaee?
but i dunno what to do tt dae.
i am officially broke this month:(
clubbin can realli cause one to be broke.
baby and i had tried to cut down on night outing with colleagues,
but they still pulled us along.
this june ,i swear every single week im heading towards clarke quay.
first week is for yiling's birthday,with 17ppl.mainly pwp n msq team.
second week is for li'he birthday,with 15 ppl BUT mostly china ppl.
third week is for choon choon's farewell,with 16ppl.mainly pwp staff.
and this week i heard lihe saying she wanna go on father day?
and next week wanna go celebrate my bdae?
i mean omg,
baby and i had become soo broke because of clubbing.

i swear i will be better,
without you i can be even much more better.
i have already moved out of ur heart,
i guess its time i do the same to u too.sigh...
joanna yong,
hapy bdae in advance(:
be happy.