Saturday, February 28, 2009 9:55 PM
280908;
it's one of the happiest day for me.
to think back of it.,
5months have already passed.
i've waited or 5months & still counting.
janelle say this is the 1st time she ever saw me liking someone for so long,
and not together with him=x.
even though i've act as though im over you,
but deep in my heart,
im still silently waiting.
i miss you alot todae,
i really do.
i hope to mit up with u reali soon.
keep going,jo:)
Friday, February 27, 2009 7:48 AM
cooking is fun with ah bee today:)
she came to find us,
and ended up cooking with her in my house:)
later on send love bento to janelle at tk.
end up was affected and hurt by her.
hao xin mei hao bao:(
had been really emo nowadays.
with those emo songs accompanying me.
sigh,i miss you alot.
but waited until this time,
i guess its kinda obvious what answer i have.
as we see each other again,
and with a smile on our face,
the past hurt has already been forgotten.
all left in our memories were only happy times.
both you and i have already found our better half.
who's right or wrong in the past is no longer important.
its just that both of us knew tt,
somehow there is still many words tt's left unsaid.
only to blame tt our meeting is too soon,
always being too selfish and causes love to end up in misery.
sacrifice all we can and end up it's still goodbye.
heaven let us meet too fast.
we were still young when fate brought us together.
now the only thing we can do is only to linger in the memories.
i miss you,alot.
i guess im till waiting,
even after this 5months.
Thursday, February 26, 2009 8:05 AM
went to watch my very first M18 movie,
my bloody valentine,today :).
together with janelle,shilah,athari,zac,zaki,haslim,mel,terrence:)
so i sat next to athari and
OMG,
the show is reali
DAMN disgustin.
i couldnt stand it,so i was like squeezing athari's hand throughout.
and after the show,babe n janelle make fun of us,
AGAIN.
in the bus,
i was actually sitting next to babe,
but end up i was readin newspaper,
than the person next to me nudge me,
turn out to be athari beside.
i was REALLY shock.
i didnt really wanted to talk to him.
but still chatted so louded in the past,
and yeap,
it was fun:)
after movie,supposed to go boonlay,
than get down with jan at paya lebar bcuz of sth.
tt moment is just like a last look and turn away.=x
my heart was feeling so heavy...
this few days janelle and i have been really chatting alot.
bring up the past with pris,zhihao,ah bee and even tingwen.
kinda missed the past,
but now its only left with janelle and i =x.
JANELLE,i hope u are okay:)
i saw you todae.
i really did.
i guess im still not ready to se you.
all the pain jus came flashin back,
and im feeling really uneasy when we were out together.
i guess im really stupid also.
after janelle scolded me just now,
i realise tat im really foolish.
but what to do?
all is done because out of love=x.sigh.
im gonna rush project and the time now is 3:39am.=x.
met kor downstairs just now,
he is another foolish in this game of love=x.
hearing a song that is really makin me damn emo right now.sigh.
Wednesday, February 25, 2009 8:03 AM
its been 12 days since we've last met up.
its been 11 days since we've last contact.
how are you?
i seriously hope that you are fine.
just to tel you that,
imissyou,sobadly.i have been listening to avril lavigne song,
YES!avril lavigne.
omg.i dunno why too.
HELLO KORKOR:)
HELLO BOYFRIEND,
omg i wanna go out with u soon!
somedae next week?
thanks for consolin me:)iloveu.
trying to keep calm and not to think so much,
i wanna be a happy girl.
and seriously,
goodbye to u my once lover.
although we are no longer together,
but after al u use to be mine.
and im gonna miss u more when u go in=x.
the rainbow i saw is indeed beautiful:)
i hope there will always be a rainbow after a heavy storm in my life:)
SERIOUSLY,
i miss you alot.
im still waiting.
我还在等你回来的那天.
12:12 AM
im sure this time you seriously hated me with all ur heart.
between us we are just like... nothing else to talk anymore.
i have to pick up so much courage to make up my mind ytd.
because i know...
i know this is the only way.
and i say all those words to hurt u,
but seriously i dun mean it.
i said it is just to make u hate me..
sigh,i think im the one who sae it,
so i shouldnt be botherin so much too.
from the start its my fault.
and now u seems like u are over it.
take care,my dearest.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009 7:46 AM
my friend,
we've been through many years of hardship together.
and this is the very first day i've ever quarrelled with u.
at that very moment,
my heart just went sinking all the way.
from the very begginning,
i knew it all that we were never close.
its all because of her tt is why we have today.
but i know if ever you moved on,
we would contact lesser or even lost contact?=x.
whatever u said just now,
just break my heart so much.
its not because its hurtful,
but it is because i've nvr seen such YOU before.
im feeling really lost.
there is just so much frenship problems tt's happening.
i wish i could learn a listenin ear,
but all i can see is my fren all gettin hurt as time goes by.
hey i know you will be reading tis.
i admit i did say lots of harsh words to you.
and i seriously dont mean it at all.
but if that is the best way for u to get over me,
and for both of us to act as though we were nv close.
this time,
it wasnt ur fault but mine.
i chose this path between us.
its gonna be damn hard on me.
to wake up in the mornin without seein ur msg or miss call.
i hope u will always take care of urself.
study hard for ur o level.
turn straight one day.
dun fan what to eat for dinner.
dont always cry at night.
dont keep ur problems to urself.
do homework everyday.
dont go home late everynight.
always sleep early.
take care of ur eyesight otherwise owax blur vision.
dont let anyone despise you.
& one last thing,
forget me.
dont ask me the reason to it,
if you wanna hate me,
just go ahead with it.
i will be fine.:)
as long as u stay happy always...
and to YOU;
i dunno when can we ever mit up again.
i feel reali upset when u said that right in front of me just now.
its just like knowing that this is finally endin after draggin so long..
i will miss you,miss those time when we go out together...
from four yrs back all the way until now.
you used to treat me like a meimei,
but everything has changed.
and no matter if we walk on the street one day,
and passed by each other without saying hi,
u will still always be who u are in my heart.
and from than till now..
you're important,
and you will always be.
LISTEN UP,
i dunno if u will be reading tis.
but i hope u know tt this is for you.
i seriously dun unerstand what ive done for u to loathe me so much.
and u chose not to tell me anything also.
you know me for soooo long,
and we ended up like this.
to you,
im NOTHING at all.
but to me,
it seems like you're my EVERYTHING.
if you happen to read this,
PLEASE text me.
text me to let me noe u are okay.
to let me know that we will always be fren still.
you seriously wan me to get out of ur life?
you seriously have forgotten me?
why didnt u utter a word abt us?
not the love,
but our friendship.!
our frenship tt was once so dear and precious.
others,others,others...
than what about me? :(
please,damn it just take the fucking pain away.
i swear i couldnt hang on anymore.
ps:this post is written for three different ppl.
and this time its true tt ah siang's going to court tml.
Monday, February 23, 2009 6:09 AM
i feel very lost right now.
this time i trusted you,
im gonna stay with u till wed before ur court case.
after all,
i once love u before.
i feel sad upon hearing that.
sigh,i dunno.
hope everything is okie for u.
2:08 AM
i wanna thank you for leaving such beautiful memories in my life.
you have always been the one i care for so much,
you have always been the one that i dote alot on,
but i guess at tt point of time,
i was realli blinded.
i just cant wait to see you again,
to be back to the past us:).
you may be feeling pissed and dislike me right now,
i wont give a damn anymore.
because im realli tired of doin so much,
and getin so f**kin hurt in the end.
but that was all in the past,
i dun hate you anymore.
what i want right now,
is to put everything behind me,
and move on happily.
so when we ever mit up again,
i will smile infront of u:)
im letting go already,
and i just cant wait for me to be happy once again:)
i miss those times when there is only the four of us.
and nobody would come between us.
but now,
all four of us have different ppl in our life.
awww!!
when can we four go out happily together again?=x
HURRY,lets catch a movie together again:)
*jo,yinjie,ah bee,janelle =))
Friday, February 20, 2009 8:13 AM
how have you been recently?
i heard thatu are sick,
sigh can u please take care of urself?
forgive me for breaking contact with you after that day.
because im afraid of getting close to you again,
i know i have to let you go.
i miss you,
i miss those happy times out together.
when we are out on the street as a clique,
playing truth or dare,
or just slacking around.
have u been thinking of me too?babe,
it seems like we are drifting..
and soon i wouldnt be seeing ur existence in my life.=x
hurry and meet me up and we'll go emo-in together:).
i miss u and awaiting for u to update me abt ur daily life.
sweets,
im glad u have made up ur mind to let go slowly.
nowadays we seem to have lesser contact with each other.
sigh,what has happen to us?
when can i ever see you again?
seriously i have so many things to tell you,
but as each days pass by...
i feel tt im no longer the mimi for u to turn to le.sigh=x
why is it that u are always there for me when im sad?
you never fail to cheer me up,
never fail to brighten up my days?
but all i wanted was actually him instead?
in my heart,
you two will always stay;forever.
i miss you,
no matter where i go,
u will always be a part of me.
Wednesday, February 18, 2009 2:43 AM
just a short post,
im glad you are happy:)
im really glad that you are.
i dont know why things would end up this way between us.
do you feel sth different this time?
no matter what i do,
and where i go,
i still miss you.
Tuesday, February 17, 2009 4:46 AM
will go back to work again,
have decided to stand up on my own feet again:)
this would be my last entry for the time being,
decided not to blog anymore for now.
ive already made up my mind to let you go,
yet you're saying me with all those hurtfuls words.
my impression are fixed in ur mindset.
i do all this out of love,
because i know we can only go this far.
i know you want me to let go,
because u can never like me back.
and u want me to be happy.
u said that u dun want me to like u because its hard for both of us to move on.
now im trying so hard to let you go.
whatever you sae,
i will owax listen to you,
seriously just this time listen to me will u?
dont come into my life and hurt me anymore,
i seriously cannot stand it.
i said all i wanted to say all these while,
but you got angry with me instead.
every single thing u will only get angry and nth else.
angry at me...
sae me behind my back,
have you even cherished me before?
and u will never be the right one too.
TO YOU;
i only ask for some time from you,
to let me give up completely.
i NEVER want to fall back for you the 3rd time anymore.
thank you for hurting me so bad this time.
i swear,its extremely painful.
if i can,
i would tell you not to let me see you anymore.
because i dont wanna get hurt by u again and again.
how i wish i could hate you,
but i know i cannot.
leaving someone when u still love him wholeheartedly,
is the hardest thing to do.
i've done so much,
and all you think of me is like this.
even if letting go,
also want to hurt me.
i had enough from you.
seriously.
don't act as though you care,
when deep down you don't at all.
you call this truth?
i called this all lie.:)
no matter how much i miss you,
i long to see you,
everything would still remain the same.
Monday, February 9, 2009 9:00 PM
i've promised athari that i will post a happy entry for this,
and this post would be specially for him:).
i still remember the first time we met,
on 18july2008,
in the centre of century square.
the second time we met was the night janelle went drinking with u guys.
somehow we act as though we've been friends for so long.
and you came over to fresh bulggogi and eat the third tme.
i remember how thomas was jealous when he saw me talking to u.
the fourth time would be the stay over in airport,
it was one of the most happiest day for us.
to think of it, we've known each other for around 8mths already.
i believe many things happen between us,
many unhappiness,
many sadness,
and even happy times.
those words u said that leave the most impression in me is,
-to all the ppl who can hear me....nabei.
-remember you have a boyfriend.
athari,
u were someone who really make me happy before.
when ive got problems at work,
u were there to hear me out.
always never fail to make me laugh at ur REALI STUPID JOKE.
i couldnt think of anything,
only that u have once reali make me happy before:)
no matter what the future holds for us,
we will always be close friend.
it must be fate that brings us closer,
and u will always be someone i dote on most:)
always remember the one n only unique name,
MOLLY MOTHARI:)
Sunday, February 8, 2009 9:57 AM
i still wanna thank you for everything u have done this 5years.
although u feel that im never thankful,
but still..
i wanna say thank you .
5years of close frenship,
now broken up.
nothin left to sae,
just pain in me.
i noe u are hurt too,
so its best we both end it.
i dun need u to care for me anymore,
please dun visit my blog,
pls delete my number,
please,
leave my life.
dun let me see u anymore.
so,
just a one last smile for u,
to thank u for seeing me grow.
i've grown up.
no longer the little girl u once noe anymore.
7:11 AM
and im slowly trying my very best to forget you.
pictures of u will slowly fade away from my memories.
and one dae u'll see tt u've become my past,
i'll be able to handle any pain tt u cause.
i will try my very very very very best,
to forget you.
im trying really hard.
Friday, February 6, 2009 7:08 PM
what have i done to make all these happen?
i have already tried to keep it all to myself,
but still,
you didnt noe anything tt is happenin and u wan to brk frenship with me.
why are u always listening to others instead of me?
seriously this time i didnt do anything to make u disappointed.
i've straighten my thoughts,
not mine means not mine.
heart does ache.
but ,
i did try my very best.
end of all,
i still failed.
its okay jo.
dont feel disheartened.
u noe u've tried:)
Wednesday, February 4, 2009 3:59 AM
i guess this time round,
it's the turning point of my life.
i have to face up with those reality.
i have to learn to let go of things tt are not meant to be mine.
it happen once,
when i choose to drift away from you because of him.
and now,
you still do the same.
so what am i to you?
i am just someone who is being used by you,
who you just need for accompanies when u're bored.
i don't deserve all this treatment from you.
i've put in all i can into this friendship,
and end of all,
you just took me for granted.
how am i supposed to walk out of this darkness when the strength i need is no longer here for me?
who can i run to when i need a shoulder to cry on?
who can i turn to when i need a listenin ear?
have you even bothered asking me how's my life?
have you even care about what's happenin to me?
i know,i know...
our friendship only mean THIS much:)
babe&sweets,
i know i have to stand strong.
i once promised u guys that i'll stand by you.
i know i cant just give up like this.
because i want to be there for u guys.
i will be fine,
no worries.
thanks for this few days of comfort,
for accompanying me to msg throughout the days.
and sweets,
thanks for talking to me for hours that night,
for telling me ur jokes n life story:)
thanks for ur morning call.
thanks for everything.
so i'll just keep on running & running,
take all this away.
i don't wanna face the truth.
i want to run..
as far as i can.
joanna yong,don't cry.不要哭,you must be strong.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009 3:07 AM
school resumed already.
i failed my hotel management and f&b management module.
i have been sick for the past 3days.
thanks so much for your unconditional love for me.sorry to have disappointed you all these while.fancy turning 18 years old this year,yet i still failed to set a goal for my future,i know you have tried ur best to be the best mother on earth.sorry that all i do was to cry infront of u,and didnt even tell u a single word.i just don't want you to be worried for me.i know you love,dote n care alot for me.its just that i've never tell u how much i appreciate you.you work like a slave,u suffered so much,just for the sake of the three of us.and im the one who hurt you the most all these while.mummy,sorry.
daddy,sorry to make u worried for me,when u're staying inside.i want you to come out..i want to tell you how much i envy others with a father,how much i do miss you sometimes.i want you to come back and stay with us.but i know mummy will never allow.i know you care.i know u dote me the most.thank you.no matter how much i hate you,u'll always be my daddy.
thank god for my granny who has been takin care of me when im sick these few days.thank god for granny who bought lunch for me when im sleeping.thank god for mummy who get herself soak in the rain just to get me my dinner.thank god for mummy who stayed up late to comfort me when im crying.thank god for dad n mum who encourage me to continue studying.thank god for dad n mum who is willing to pull me thru this stressful period.thank god for my family.
sigh,sorry to have disappointed all of you.
